Learning to let people in when your child is diagnosed

By Jodie Turner

“There are some people that could hear you speak a thousand words and still not understand………. And there are others who will understand without you even speaking a word”

I remember the day we received our son, Jay’s, diagnosis. We sat in the doctor’s consulting room and I had a sudden rush of emotion…. the emotion I can only describe as the feeling you get when you feel like your world is crashing down around you. Jay had been diagnosed with left-sided spastic hemiplegia cerebral palsy.

At the time I had numerous people around to support me emotionally – my family, close friends and my ever supportive husband – but I felt completely alone in a world of uncertainty.

I had so many questions going round in my head. My defence mechanisms told me to cry – a million tears that felt like they were never going to stop. In my head I went through an endless list of questions – questions I couldn’t possibly know the answers to. I Googled obsessively and researched until my mind was completely overloaded with “ifs, buts and maybes”.

Looking back, I can clearly see that despite all the people around me, I tried to deal with Jay’s diagnosis completely solo.

You want to hear some advice from someone who tried to go solo?

AVOID GOING SOLO.

When you receive your child’s diagnosis…just ride those waves of emotion that you’re going to feel. This is a normal process; take it one step at a time and begin your journey of acceptance.

Once you are ready – let people in; the people closest to you, the people who will help you through your darkest days. Those people who will listen to your fears, those who will understand you and hold a non-judgemental conversation, those who encourage you and remind you….that you are enough (more than enough).

Once I learnt to accept emotional support from others, it made me more able to help and support other people around me. I was able to help my husband accept Jay’s diagnosis, help other families at the same or similar stage in their life, and I was able to plan with a clear mind …a plan to give Jay the best therapy and teach Jay the exact same thing I learnt throughout this process………..”Never go through things alone”

Here’s my shout out to those people who have provided valuable pages in my survival guide.

Thank you. My incredible family, my brutally honest friends (hey – we all need them), my loving husband Scott (the one who never ever lets us down), our beautiful boys, Joel and Jay who remind me every single day what life is really about! And finally, our Instagram family who continue to support us every single day @team_jayjay_cp 

The support alone has given us belief…. belief that we are enough and together as a family we TOTALLY GOT THIS!!!!!!

You can follow more of Jay’s journey on Instagram – @team_jayjay_cp